Rating: 2.0★
Let me lay my cards on the table before we go any further: experimental, avant-garde cinema has never really been my thing. I find it fascinating in theory and frequently maddening in practice, and A Visit to the Louvre is about as pure a test of that tension as
Rating: 2.0★
Let me be honest with you: I only watched White Chicks to tick a box. Specifically, a box on the Letterboxd list "Top 250 Most Fans", which meant sitting through Keenen Ivory Wayans's 2004 comedy purely in the name of completionism. I have nobody to blame
Rating: 2.0★
I could not have gone into Queens of the Dead wanting to like it more. George A. Romero is one of my most-watched directors, full stop, and his Day of the Dead remains the only horror film I have ever handed a full five stars. So when I learned
Rating: 2.0★
I'm not inherently opposed to a zombie comedy. When done right, blending the undead with sharp, dark humour can yield absolute classics. From Shaun of the Dead to the chaotic fun of the Return of the Living Dead series, the genre has proven it can handle laughs and
Rating: 2.0★
It took me watching two separate Andrew Garfield-led Spider-Man films to suddenly realise that the director's surname is Webb. I found that delayed epiphany significantly more amusing than anything that actually happens on screen in The Amazing Spider-Man 2. When a sequel leaves you more
Rating: 2.0★
There is a very specific point where a beloved sci-fi franchise stops being a sharp, satirical triumph and simply devolves into a corporate cash grab. RoboCop 3 is that exact point, and I say that as someone who genuinely loves the original and has a soft spot for the
Rating: 2.0★
If you've spent many hours scaling treacherous cliffs and picking through ancient ruins in the Uncharted video game series like I have, sitting down to Ruben Fleischer's 2022 film adaptation feels less like a cinematic reunion and more like a profound betrayal. That's not
Rating: 2.0★
I must be missing the memo. Fallen Leaves has been hailed all over the place as some sort of triumphant return to form, a festival darling showered with praise, and I sat there watching it wondering what on earth everyone else was seeing that I wasn't. Strip away
Rating: 2.0★
There's a line, even in a franchise built on monsters shooting lightning from their cheeks and evolving via friendship. Pokémon: The Arceus Chronicles vaults clean over it, lands on the other side, and seems perfectly happy about the whole thing. I came to this with reasonable expectations. I
![[REC]² (2009)](https://image.tmdb.org/t/p/w780/4JG5WKfIGD6r7hdbqJVr2WKIxEe.jpg)
Rating: 2.0★
There is a specific kind of frustration that only found-footage horror can produce: staring at a pitch-black screen, squinting into the grain, waiting for a scare that never quite arrives because the night-vision camera is pointing at a wall. Again. [REC] left me a little cold for
Rating: 2.0★
If you've ever wondered what happens when you take the saccharine, paint-by-numbers formula of a daytime television romance and transplant it to the Middle East, Elie El Semaan's Honeymoonish has your answer. And spoiler: the answer is not as interesting as you'd
Rating: 2.0★
There's a very specific kind of tired that sets in when you're watching a film and you realise, about fifteen minutes in, that absolutely nothing surprising is going to happen. That's the feeling that settled over me watching Pokémon the Movie: Secrets of the
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